Maybe I have an inferiority complex. Maybe I can’t live with the fact that I’m a “second-rate citizen.”
Maybe I should just pull a Brooke and go ballistic for something seemingly insignificant. (Watch the whole thing - it's worth it. It has to rank pretty high on the "Unintentional Comedy Scale." What about it, Bill?)
(Ok, I’m not going to go that far. But I’m not going to lie and say I didn’t think about it.)
Let me set up the scene…
I TiVoed the Thrashers/Rangers game from Tuesday night because Rachel and I were going out and I wanted to watch it later. Being the first playoff appearance for the Thrashers, I wanted to make sure I caught every minute of the action. I kept from watching the “Bottom Line” on the Worldwide Leader the entire night to ensure that I would truly enjoy the game without knowing the result of the game beforehand.
When we got home, I made a late night snack, set-up the DVD-Recorder, and plopped down to enjoy Game 3. My wife tried to ruin the outcome for me a couple times before she finally went to bed. Let’s just say, I kind of wish she had before I spent 2 hours recording the game to DVD.
(That’s a lie. I would’ve been more upset had she said anything.)
The Rangers scored the game’s opening goal 31 seconds in, and the Thrashers were done from there.
Maybe I should just pull a Brooke and go ballistic for something seemingly insignificant. (Watch the whole thing - it's worth it. It has to rank pretty high on the "Unintentional Comedy Scale." What about it, Bill?)
(Ok, I’m not going to go that far. But I’m not going to lie and say I didn’t think about it.)
Let me set up the scene…
I TiVoed the Thrashers/Rangers game from Tuesday night because Rachel and I were going out and I wanted to watch it later. Being the first playoff appearance for the Thrashers, I wanted to make sure I caught every minute of the action. I kept from watching the “Bottom Line” on the Worldwide Leader the entire night to ensure that I would truly enjoy the game without knowing the result of the game beforehand.
When we got home, I made a late night snack, set-up the DVD-Recorder, and plopped down to enjoy Game 3. My wife tried to ruin the outcome for me a couple times before she finally went to bed. Let’s just say, I kind of wish she had before I spent 2 hours recording the game to DVD.
(That’s a lie. I would’ve been more upset had she said anything.)
The Rangers scored the game’s opening goal 31 seconds in, and the Thrashers were done from there.
Keith Tkachuk was brought in at the trade deadline to offer leadership to the younger players – like Ilya Kovalchuk – and he allowed the most hated man in the league (as voted by his peers) to get under his skin. (That’s right, Sean Avery. You know him from Cribs and the significant other of Elisha Cuthbert.) Kovy finally got his revenge on Avery in the third though.
Nothing went right for the Thrashers on this night. They were outhustled, outmuscled, outplayed in every aspect of the game. Frustration boiled over in Hoss and Slava – two normally cool characters. Long story short, the Rangers won the game 7-0.
7-0! And to boot, this game gave me more reason to hate New York. Towards the end of the second period, Rangers fans began to mock the Tomahawk Chop in the stands. I guess if you can’t beat the Braves, you have to mock them, right? In the middle of the third, over the P.A. they began to play “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond. Usually, there’s no problem here. I’m a big Neil Diamond fan. But, when the Red Sox play the same song during the 7th Inning Stretch in Fenway, and New Yorkers want to make it their own, something’s not right. Too often, New Yorkers talk about how much better they are than Bostonians, and how they don’t want to be like them… But then they steal their trademark? Nice.
Anyway, here’s a running list I’ve created for all the reasons I hate New York, in no particular order (and I’m sure it will get longer in no time):
1. Aaron Freakin’ Boone – killed the Sox in ’03 ALCS
2. Jeff Van Gundy’s Hair – at least he cut it when he got to Houston
3. $80 hotel rooms the size of a shoe box
4. George Steinbrenner
5. Derek Jeter – overrated defensively, and not that good-looking. Enough said.
6. Sean Avery – see above
7. A-Rod – stupid nickname, purple lips, sissy slap. At least he didn’t come to the Sox.
8. Taxi fares – $30 for three blocks? Are you kidding me?
9. Jets fans – they boo everyone the Jets pick in the Draft. The Jets could select Jesus himself, and they’d boo.
10. Isiah Thomas – terrible coach, terrible executive, but heck of a talent scout. Go figure.
11. 2006-2007 New York Knicks – highest paid bunch of losers in history of NBA. Everything that’s wrong with the NBA in a nutshell.
12. I Love New York – no, I don’t!
13. Bucky Freakin’ Dent – killed the Sox in ’78 to take away Pennant
14. Michael Kay
15. James Dolan – my grandmother could run the Knicks better than this guy.
16. New York Times
17. Every “thug” teenager that acts like their life is an audition for The Sopranos.
18. Dirty Water Dogs
19. The Yankees 26 Championships and how every Yankee fan believes they had a part in each of them.
20. 1996 World Series – Braves were the better team that year. Ask any intelligent sports writer.
21. (In that same vein) Jim Leyritz – his batting stance irked the devil out of me.
22. Sex & the City - eeeww
23. Dirty, dingy subways
24. John Starks, Patrick Ewing, Charles Oakley, Charles Smith, and Derek Harper – I couldn’t stand those guys!
25. The Eli Manning Experiment – I feel for him. He’s not Peyton. And his facial expressions say the same.
26. Jeffrey Maier
There’s more, but I’ll leave it at that.
How do you start a fire? Start talking about New York. You’ll see.
Nothing went right for the Thrashers on this night. They were outhustled, outmuscled, outplayed in every aspect of the game. Frustration boiled over in Hoss and Slava – two normally cool characters. Long story short, the Rangers won the game 7-0.
7-0! And to boot, this game gave me more reason to hate New York. Towards the end of the second period, Rangers fans began to mock the Tomahawk Chop in the stands. I guess if you can’t beat the Braves, you have to mock them, right? In the middle of the third, over the P.A. they began to play “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond. Usually, there’s no problem here. I’m a big Neil Diamond fan. But, when the Red Sox play the same song during the 7th Inning Stretch in Fenway, and New Yorkers want to make it their own, something’s not right. Too often, New Yorkers talk about how much better they are than Bostonians, and how they don’t want to be like them… But then they steal their trademark? Nice.
Anyway, here’s a running list I’ve created for all the reasons I hate New York, in no particular order (and I’m sure it will get longer in no time):
1. Aaron Freakin’ Boone – killed the Sox in ’03 ALCS
2. Jeff Van Gundy’s Hair – at least he cut it when he got to Houston
3. $80 hotel rooms the size of a shoe box
4. George Steinbrenner
5. Derek Jeter – overrated defensively, and not that good-looking. Enough said.
6. Sean Avery – see above
7. A-Rod – stupid nickname, purple lips, sissy slap. At least he didn’t come to the Sox.
8. Taxi fares – $30 for three blocks? Are you kidding me?
9. Jets fans – they boo everyone the Jets pick in the Draft. The Jets could select Jesus himself, and they’d boo.
10. Isiah Thomas – terrible coach, terrible executive, but heck of a talent scout. Go figure.
11. 2006-2007 New York Knicks – highest paid bunch of losers in history of NBA. Everything that’s wrong with the NBA in a nutshell.
12. I Love New York – no, I don’t!
13. Bucky Freakin’ Dent – killed the Sox in ’78 to take away Pennant
14. Michael Kay
15. James Dolan – my grandmother could run the Knicks better than this guy.
16. New York Times
17. Every “thug” teenager that acts like their life is an audition for The Sopranos.
18. Dirty Water Dogs
19. The Yankees 26 Championships and how every Yankee fan believes they had a part in each of them.
20. 1996 World Series – Braves were the better team that year. Ask any intelligent sports writer.
21. (In that same vein) Jim Leyritz – his batting stance irked the devil out of me.
22. Sex & the City - eeeww
23. Dirty, dingy subways
24. John Starks, Patrick Ewing, Charles Oakley, Charles Smith, and Derek Harper – I couldn’t stand those guys!
25. The Eli Manning Experiment – I feel for him. He’s not Peyton. And his facial expressions say the same.
26. Jeffrey Maier
There’s more, but I’ll leave it at that.
How do you start a fire? Start talking about New York. You’ll see.
1 comment:
Number 24 dude. Number 24.
John Starks can eat it!
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